Numb
by BellatrixLestrangey
Summary: This is more of an M rated fic; Icy gets sexually assaulted by The Wizards of the Black Circle. How does she cope? Do any of them help her? Etc.
1. One Dead Cold Night

**Fair warning to all, this one has a very strong adult theme to it (rape). I don't get into graphic detail but if you're uncomfortable with the topic, please just don't read.**

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Cold welcomed itself into the dark forest. She sat in the just outside the foreign cave, legs drawn closely to her body-quivering just short of violently. A horrid and unwanted lack of clothing did no good in sheltering her pale body from the chill creeping its way up and down her body-and it wasn't the only thing to do so that night. She didn't know his name, never even seen him before, but _he_ had somehow found a way to creep up and down her body regardless. And his non-consensual touch left her trembling more fiercely than the cold ever had. At least the cold was familiar to her, at least she could grow used to and even enjoy the frosty feeling. Maybe that's why she hadn't re-entered the warmth of the cave-perhaps the frigid air would numb the emotions...the lingering sensation of a phantom hand-exactly where it didn't belong-right out of her.

As hard as she tried to get the scene out of her head it kept replaying over and over again. "Don't worry, you'll enjoy it as much as I will." "I know you're a naughty girl, you've displayed it time and time again." And Icy couldn't even deny that last part. She had done some particularly naughty things...but noting of that nature. He had the wrong kind of naughty in his mind. Naturally she had protested, and with both verbal and physical force. "Come on please, can't you just do this with me just once?" The blonde wizard requested. To which she recalled saying "No way in Hell" and "You don't even know my name." The wizard clearly wouldn't take no for an answer. If she had it right, it was at that point that he had made the 'naughty girl remarks' and something along the lines of "Your mouth says no, your cloths say yes." At that point she couldn't help but to look down-just to make sure she wasn't actually wearing a shirt that read 'YES' in big bold letters. As expected she wasn't. Nope, Icy was wearing what she always wore.

It wasn't long before the man had propped himself atop her. Icy had no problem shoving him off with a blast of cold wind. But then his friends; the one with the bright red hair and the one with the dark skin came to his aid. It was three against one and they clearly knew how to hunt and capture a magical being. Between the three of them, Icy had been forced to the rocky ground. And the blonde proceeded with his dirty deed. At that point Icy stopped struggling as it was a useless waste of energy. And if the blonde's initial actions weren't agonizing enough, the other two stood by laughing and cheering the man on. Icy looked away from them and her eyes fell upon another man standing in the corner. His arms were folded across his chest and he was looking every which way clearly trying to avoid witnessing the unfolding scene. He ran his hand through his pink mohawk.

By all means Icy was doing her very best to keep staring at him; it was much better than staring at the man who was assaulting her and maybe, just maybe that boy would grow a pair and tare his friend off of her. Eventually the blonde took her face in his hand, stared her right in the eye and informed her that she belonged to him...that he always fancied a lady with frosty powers...a lady that put up a fight. She spat in his face. This earned her a more vicious assault. And the question "Do you want to try that again ice princess?" Mentally she told herself yes, what did she have to lose now? But she refrained. And somewhere along the lines Icy could swear the blonde saying something about how they were one in the same. That she would do the same in his position.

Head now buried in her hands, nails digging into her scalp, she couldn't help but to contemplate that one. Were they the same? Would she do that to someone else? At first Icy was damn certain that the answer was no. But then she thought way back...back to the first year she encountered Bloom. She hadn't done a damn thing when Darcy seduced Riven, in fact she rather condoned it. It was humorous.

She deserved this.

And so Icy decide to run, but not without venturing back into the cave to retrieve her clothing. She ran faster than she could ever imagine. Not to escape the wizards (they had already fled the scene) but to escape her own thoughts. And the more intensely the feeling of all of their hands all over her replayed in her head the harder she ran. At a considerable distance into the forest Icy came to a dead halt, realizing that she couldn't run away from this one. She couldn't escape her own memories. With a frustrated cry she found herself beating her fists into a tree over and over again until warm blood trickled out of her splintered knuckles and down her hand. Another frustrated cry, this one more of a sob and Icy let herself sink to the ground again. And then came the tears. Icy couldn't tell if they were formed from her fear, her sadness, or her rage. It was probably a mix of all three.

How embarrassing...

At least no one was there to see her...

At some point in the night the woman must have worn herself out, for she had slumped to the ground into a painful slumber. One where her dreams were invaded by the blonde wizard's face. And her nightmare was almost worse than the real thing...almost...at least the bondage wasn't real.

At least in the nightmare she was able to claw at his face pretty good.

Even so Icy had woken up, a lump in her throat. But she couldn't cry, she was fresh out of tears. Every time the woman tried to fall asleep she was visited by her attacker. She'd never be able to sleep again would she?

And so she sat up, once again holding her knees close to her chest. They couldn't get to her if she remained like that. But they did, they got her again and again through her own head. This time her thoughts wandered to the wizard with the mohawk. It was a good while into the attack when her eyes finally locked into his. And his golden eyes were laced with certain agony and shame. "I'm sorry. I can't help you." He mouthed."

"Fine then, just stand there. You're a weak little boy." Icy managed to holler. And the man turned his head.

Shameful. Disgusting.

And then he did something. He transformed him to a snake of some sort, hissing threats of venom laced bites if they continued the assault. The read-head roared with laughter. And he sustained a swift bite to the ankle. With a scowl the other two retreated. The one with the mohawk now back in his human form followed his friends out of the cave-likely on a quest to find an antidote to that snake venom.

A long while later (infused with much mental pain) Icy got her closure; a headline in the newspaper reading 'Black Circle Wizards Meet Their Frigid Ends.' The article described a backfired spell freezing them utterly solid. What a fitting end for them, Icy couldn't have asked for a better one. For a split second she even considered thanking those pesky Winx. But that would arise many questions, and she had no interest in sharing anything with them. She hadn't even bought herself to speak of this with Darcy and Stormy.

After all, some things are just best left unsaid. Perhaps if she avoided the topic it would just go away...

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**This is actually my first fic with a theme of this nature, so please let me know how I did and what I can improve on.**


	2. What Was Gained And What Was Lost

**Just wanted to thank Midnights-AM-Child and Akela Victoire for the great and kind reviews. I actually only have a vague idea where I'm taking this one so bare with me.**

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But it didn't go away.

It never would go away…at least not for at least another eighteen years. Icy ran her hand over the slight curve of her belly, wondering if she should just kill the damn thing before it had a chance to live—before it had a chance to bare her attacker's face. Frankly Icy didn't want _any_ reminder of that night, not even in the form of innocent blue—or maybe _his_ silver—eyes staring up at her. In fact the last thing she wanted was to bear a child with that man's genetics blended in.

And just how the hell was she supposed to tell Darcy and Stormy? As of late she could still hide the baby bump through baggy clothing and uncharacteristically long jackets (that raised a fair amount of suspicion on their own). And to be honest Icy didn't really mind wearing such outfits, she sure as hell felt safer that way. But it wouldn't be long before month three turned into month five and then five into nine, at that point there really would be no hiding it. And for (seemingly) the hundredth time since that night Icy pounded her fists into the nearest object in sheer frustration. She sucked in a deep breath and slowly blew it out. Yup, she was going to do it, she was going to march right into the hospital and murder her own child. It would be for the best right? Clearly Icy was not mother martial—being completely honest with herself—with her explosive temper, she'd probably abuse the poor thing. And how could she possibly bring a kid into such a bitter world…a world with people thrice as terrible as she. She was sparing the child a life's worth of suffering, and that wasn't a bad thing right?

Icy pulled on her coat and began fastening the buttons when Darcy slid her way into the room. _Crap! _"You said you wouldn't be home until four!" Icy shouted.

"Yeah well Ryan didn't show me much of a good time." Darcy complained with a shrug. "And he didn't even pay for our lunch. Is my existence a problem?"

"_Your_ existence isn't the problem…" Icy trailed off. It had become painfully obvious that her secret was on the verge of exposure. Icy silently prayed that Darcy wouldn't turn around until she managed to fasten the last button. But of course that was asking too much.

One eyebrow raised Darcy remarked "Whoever you found yourself is clearly more fun than Ryan."

"Hardly." Icy muttered. She was then overcome with a wave of both anger and despair in their most intense forms. And with it the urge to punch something—that something being Darcy's face for even suggesting she had 'fun'. And yet all she wanted to do was cry…again. But she held her uncaring façade. One humiliation at a time.

"Hardly? What do you mean hardly?" Darcy asked.

Icy bit her lip, cracks forming in her mask of no emotion. And then she relayed the story to Darcy; from "You're a naughty girl." to the brush of the wizard's hand up her inner thigh. And then to the short while after.

The day she found out about the baby.

It was about a month after the initial assault when Icy felt the first waves of nausea. The morning sickness. She had desperately tried to play it off in her head as a mere cold or stomach flu, but she knew damn well that people marshaling powers of ice rarely caught colds. At that point denial was her happy place. But when the cravings and the fatigue and moreover the halting of her monthly cycle it Icy had succumbed to the truth. Even so she had taken the test just to be sure. Positive. Why was it that this was the one test she had passed?

"Just how have you managed to get to the doctor for your…checkups without Stormy and I noticing?" Darcy asked.

"I haven't." Icy answered.

"Haven't what? Because I haven't noticed anything different about your schedule."

"I haven't gone to the hospital. You're the only one who knows." Icy muttered.

"Well you really should go then." Darcy replied.

"I was just heading there." Icy snapped. "I'm getting an abortion."

"You can't do that!" Darcy shouted.

"Sure I can." Icy hissed.

"But it's a human being." Darcy reasoned.

"No it's not, not yet." Icy insisted. "I don't even want this baby. I don't want to feed it. Take care of it. Love it…" she paused "I can't love it."

"Sure you can." Darcy mumbled.

"Damn it Darcy! This is why I didn't want you, or anyone else to know about this." Icy hollered. "My God, you only care about the baby. What about me? Don't you care about how _I_ feel? Aren't you going to ask me if _I'm_ okay?" Icy took a deep breath. "Don't you think I need someone to talk to?" She added softly.


	3. A Change Of Heart

**A big thanks to cybercorpsesnake for the reviews. Always great to get some feedback. **

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Darcy stared blankly at her sister for a lingering minute or two. Both speaking one word. Just the sound of Icy's semi-erratic breathing. At last Darcy spoke. "Of course I care how you feel, I just don't want you to do something you'll..."

Icy cut her off "I'll what? Regret? Already have. Numerous times. What's another thing to the list?"

"You've never killed someone before." Darcy looked to the floor.

"It's not even alive." Icy's voice doubled in volume.

"Not yet, but _he or she_ will be." Darcy looked back into her sister's eyes.

"Yes. _It_ will be. And it will only serve to remind me of it's father. I don't want to remember it's father." Icy finally snapped, a tear or two trickling down her cheeks. Darcy reminded silent, frankly she didn't know what to say. What do you say to someone in Icy's position? I know how you feel? That would be a load of crap and Darcy knew it. It'll be okay? Also a pretty big load of crap.

At last Darcy found something to say. "Did they at least catch him?"

"Them." Icy corrected, her tone now void of any emotion. "As far as I know they're dead." She paused "Backfired spell. Frozen solid. Just like they should be."

"Well at least you don't have to worry about them coming back." Darcy pointed out.

"That's just it. I want him to come back." Icy hissed. "I want to be the one to freeze him solid. And I want to do it slowly and painfully." Darcy opened her mouth to speak, but Icy continued with her ranting. "And if I do have this baby I'd love to do the same to it."

"You wouldn't do that." Darcy protested.

"And how do you figure this?" Icy lifted an eyebrow.

"Because I know you, I've known you since we were children." Darcy declared.

"Yes, and you know me well enough to know that I'd be a horrid mother." Icy added.

"You took care of Stormy and I just fine. Remember that time when Stormy was practicing with her magic and-not only zapped herself pretty good-but propelled herself right into the pond? You were the one to go in and save her before she sunk to the bottom like a boulder. And you were the one to comfort her and encourage her to keep practicing despite her fear." Darcy recalled. "You can be a mother. A good mother. You're just afraid to be."

"I'm not afraid." Icy muttered firmly.

"Then prove it. Show me that you're not afraid." Darcy challenged. And without another word she made her way into the room over. Her lack of sympathy could kill. But Icy couldn't argue that such a lack of sympathy was really the only way to get through to her...the comforting and soothing would come after she carried the baby to full term. And probably every now and again throughout the other eight months-six as of this date. Icy let out a fairly melodramatic sigh and placed a hand on her belly once more, she'd be off to the hospital alright, but with a much different task.

Darcy always did have this infuriating way of getting Icy to see it her way. Without even having to resort to her deceitful powers.


	4. One Dark Embrace

**Some more thank yous too Akela Victoire and cybercorpsesnake for reviewing regularly. I appreciate your feedback.**

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Icy wasn't one to cry, but for about the hundredth time in those few months she let the tears fall, she did so in the privacy of her own room. She didn't quite understand why she was crying herself-and that only made her angrier with herself for exploiting such weakness-she didn't even want the baby. So why? Why was she so upset to hear that, because of her neglect the past few months, the baby may not be born alive. And if it did come out alive that it would probably sustain some mental of physical disability. Icy remembered the doctors mentioning some sort of disease but couldn't recall which. To be completely honest with herself she didn't really want to know. She was once again at the point of ignoring the problem until it faded away...or in this case surfaced and became painfully undeniable. Not only would she have a reminder of the wizard but a reminder that she had failed as a mother before she'd even laid eyes on the kid as well. Her attacker was truly gift that kept on giving-more like a sickness that kept returning and she just wanted out of the whole thing. At one point Icy could recall having herself totally convinced that this was all just some horrid dream that she'd soon wake up from and then get back to her life or an illusion spell of sorts that would soon fall away and she'd feel much more at ease. But like every other instance the truth surfaced and she had no choice but to face it. She was a mother, a shitty one at that, and her baby wasn't going to a pretty sight upon delivery-dead or alive.

There came a knock at her door. Icy had half the mind to tell the knocker to just leave. Before she could even open her mouth Darcy waltzed her way in. "I sent Stormy to the store, she's going to get you some medication that will help with your morning sickness and that is safe for the baby."

"Does it really matter if it's safe for the baby? They said it would come with...complications anyhow." Icy replied.

"Is that what they said?" Darcy asked.

"No, I'm making shit up to screw with you. Yes that's what they said!" Icy snapped.

Darcy pulled her sister into her arms so that her head rested against her chest. She began lightly running her hands through Icy's hair in some attempt at a soothing gesture. Icy hadn't the slightest clue as to how Darcy learned to be so comforting. All these years Darcy had really only displayed gestures of the most unkind sort, when did she become a saint. "You want to talk about it?"

"No." Icy answered rather abruptly. "It's not like you can fix the baby." She added more to herself.

"Not about the baby, Icy. About you. About waht happened that night" Darcy corrected.

"No." Icy mumbled again.

"Come on Ice...you and I both know that your favorite topic to talk about is yourself." Darcy pointed out with a hint of a smile-mostly at the use of Icy's nickname. A smile that was not returned.

"Not anymore." Icy answered.

"And why is that?" Darcy questioned.

"Because..." she let the word hang there for a moment, still not entirely sure of how she wanted to finish. "Because I don't like me anymore." Her voice had risen to something of a shout-a shout that had a slight hitch in it. She wasn't going to cry in front of Darcy. "Because I let him do it. I'm weak. I'm filthy. I LET HIM DO IT!" She yelled again, this time the unshed tears weighted heavy behind her eyes. Icy bit her lip (hard enough to draw droplets of blood at that) and just like that she had let Darcy bait her into talking.

"That's not true." Darcy muttered.

"What isn't true?" Icy asked sliding herself out of Darcy's embrace and back into the corner she found herself in prior.

"Any of 're not weak. You said it yourself, it was three against one. Do you know who they are? They're the Wizards of the Black Circle; they catch witches and faeries for a living. They knew exactly what to do and how to do it. I don't even think Bloom and her mighty dragon fire could have outlasted them." Darcy explained. Icy made not attempt to respond. "You're not filthy either. I know you well enough to assume you didn't just let him 'do it'. I can imagine he didn't get out completely unharmed."

At this Icy couldn't help but smile as she pridefully recalled spitting in his face. "Of course he didn't." She said at last.

"Exactly. You're not filthy. You're not weak. You didn't _let_ him do 't ever say that again." Darcy stated more firmly. "Now come downstairs, Stormy and I were talking about seeing a movie tomorrow and you **are** coming with us."

"You can't tell me what to do." Icy mumbled with not much fight, truth be told a movie sounded nice. "Fine I'll come, but I'm picking the movie."

"Fair enough." Darcy answered. "We'll go as soon as Stormy gets back. "And about the baby. Just give it time, see what happens. You don't really think your the first person to have complications do you? If you actually keep going I'm pretty sure your doctor can solve a good deal."

"Maybe." Icy responded.

At that moment Stormy burst through the door. "I tried my best I really did! But I saw this pair of studded sandals and I really wanted them so I may have spent the money on those instead." She put on her most angelic smile.

Icy wrenched the pair of footwear out of her youngest sister's hands. "Why did you trust her with the money Darcy?"

"Don't worry about it, we can just pick up the meds along the way, I guess." Darcy muttered.

"Can I have my shoes back?" Stormy asked.

"No." Icy answered. "Consider them your gift to me as an act of sympathy."

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**I kind of figured Icy could use a mental break. As much as I enjoy putting my favorite characters through hell, I feel like some comic relief here and there is nice.**


	5. What Happened That Night

**In which no fic is complete without at least one flashback. And thanks again everyone for keeping up with the story.**

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The movie wasn't anything spectacular or anything, but it did serve it's purpose; it took Icy's mind away from the blonde wizard's face for a good hour and a half-but she was certain he'd pay her a visit somewhere between sleep and awareness. Icy tried her best to suppress that thought but she found suppression was becoming increasingly difficult as the load piled up. But nonetheless she pushed that thought back too.  
Instead Icy decided to ponder upon a different realization; it had been a good while since she had been to downtown Magix and to her surprise if felt somewhat nice to be there again...to remember that time when she had nearly obliterated the place-good times, good times indeed. Icy's moment of noglastia was interrupted by a wave of nausea, and through it Darcy's muffled voice instructed her to take a seat. One of her sisters-or maybe it was a passerby-helped to keep her body from falling to the pavement. No sooner was she laying (on her back) upon a park bench. Between the late spring heat and the pregnancy...life seemed to have it in for her.

"I'll go get the meds now." Darcy decided.

"I'll stay here and make sure Icy doesn't die or something." Stormy volunteered.

"Like you had any other choice." Darcy shrugged as she took off across the street.

"So what's wrong with you anyways?" Stormy asked. _How oblivious can she be?_ Icy mused to herself. Apparently very oblivious. And with much reluctance Icy once again relayed the details of her mishap with the Black Circle Wizards.

"When were you going to tell me this!?" Stormy practically shouted. "Always the last to know..." she added to herself.

"I was going to tell you whenever you asked." Icy shrugged. It seemed fair enough to her.

"And if I never asked?" Stormy inquired.

Icy shrugged once more. "I suppose the truth would have came out eventually, it always does."

Darcy arrived back with a bottle of pills in her hand. Icy scowled; the thought of swallowing a pill or two a day wasn't exactly a pleasant one. She propped herself up and held her hand out. Rather than giving her the whole bottle, Darcy placed a single pill on Icy's palm. After downing the pill (the gagging sensation included) Icy spoke. "So, you going to fork over the rest of them?"

"I'll give them to you as you need them." Darcy answered quite flatly.

"I'm fairly certain I can handle..." Icy started.

"No. Not after last time." Darcy whispered.

Last time.

The day was long past but the memory lingered there as vivid and intense as the instant it had occurred. It was in her second year of high school-if Icy remembered correctly anyhow-that year was particularly difficult. It was the year her parents had been scammed out of a considerable sum of money. The year they failed to pay the electricity bills, and then the water bills, and eventually the rent. It was the year her family was kicked to the streets. The year Icy had gone to school, then left about half way through the day to uphold a job-and at one point two. The year she was near expelled for being truant so often. The year she had to explain in front of the entire class that the reason she was always tardy or never there at all (and without explanation) was because _she_ had to provide for a drunken mother and a sickly father (who was, by all means trying his very best). And that she had no home...and on top of everything had not mentioned a thing to anyone because she didn't want anyone to know that she had _nothing_, that she _was_nothing. At the heartless surge of laughter and insults, her teacher attempted to apologize. It was at Icy's delectation of "I'm not coming back tomorrow." that her teacher realized she had screwed up. And it was when Icy got home to realize that her mother had spent all the money she worked her ass off to earn on more alcohol, that she realized she was unappreciated...unloved. It was that night that her mother told her that her father had come to pass and that she was useless and couldn't possibly save either of them. And that night that Icy realized just what she had meant by "I'm not coming back tomorrow." With the little cash her mom had left her with, Icy bought a sizable bottle of piles, and she downed them all. She downed them all despite the protests shouted her way.  
Darcy found her...  
Darcy followed her...  
Darcy saw all of it unfold...

Darcy was the one protesting. Icy's mom couldn't give a damn.

Icy drew in a deep breath. "That was nine years ago. You can trust me."

"I almost lost my only friend." Darcy choked. "I ignored the signs last time..."

"I'm fine!" Icy yelled, making more a spectacle of herself than she would have liked.

"No you aren't. _I know you._" Darcy answered. "Despite the walls you put up, I know when you're at your breaking point."

"Can we do this at home?" Icy asked. "Where there are, you know, less people."

Not easily detoured, Darcy clapped her hands together. No sooner where they back in their apartment.

"Will somebody tell me what's going on?" Stormy whined.

"Nothing is going on. I'm fine." Icy hissed. "I'm fine." She repeated more calmly. Silence hung between the three witches. "Really, I'm fine. The movie didn't totally suck, I got a decent break from my problems and Stormy wasn't painfully infuriating." Icy tried again.

More silence and then Darcy spoke."Alright, we'll give you some alone time." At those words Icy began to wonder who the older sister really was...she really needed to establish her dominance..."Stormy and I will pick up something to eat."

"We will?" Stormy asked.

"Yes, we will." Darcy answered.

"Whatever you say." Stormy replied stepping outside the door.

"We'll be back in about fifteen minutes. Twenty max." Darcy informed Icy.

"I can handle myself for fifteen minutes." Icy rolled her eyes. "I'm. Fine."

"I care about you, Icy." Darcy said softly and when the door shut, everything spilled out...

Everything...

Icy was far from fine and she knew it.


	6. Let It Go

**Let the angst begin.**

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Icy was quite so far from fine in fact that she found herself slumping to the floor. The weight of everything that happened, everything that was to come, finally setting in-taking its physical toll. Every little thing that Icy had suppressed spilled over; all the pressures, all the insecurities, all the questions. "How can I be a mother?" "Will this kid even like me?" "How will I tell the kid about its father?" "How will everyone else treat me?"

"Why?"

And Icy cried. Not just a few tears. Not just short and simple ten minute fit. It was an all out bawl; choked sobs, shaking body, uneven breaths. And she couldn't hold the tears back, she hadn't even the strength to try. And then she let out a scream wracked with emotional pain. And another...and another, until she could feel soreness burning within her throat. And then she went back to simply sobbing...and then muttering "why, why, why?" between each shaking sob. Icy had to stop-she knew it-she had to, before she hurt herself. Drawing in multiple deep breaths, she ran a violently trembling hand through her hair. More deep and erratic breaths. Struggled inhale, shaky exhale...and repeat. They did little to sooth Icy. Frustrated that she could bring herself to calm down she cried out again (this time more loudly than the first three) and slammed her fist into the floor. "DAMN IT!" She screamed bashing the tiling again. By now the witch was hyperventilating. "Damn it!" And this time she forced any image of the wizard that she could muster and slammed her fist, again, into the tiling. And again, this time harder. As though bringing her wrath down on the floor could obliterate any recollection of that night. And at that thought she began to laugh...laugh and cry all at once. It was a mess...she was a mess. And she laughed harder, more tears sliding to the floor. _Isn't this just pathetic_? She mused, and then she realized she said it out loud. Why was she even laughing? She couldn't even begin to fathom why. Consumed with rage at her new found confusion, Icy picked up the nearest item and flung it across the room. She heaved herself up and grabbed another object-this one also finding itself to the opposite end of the room. And at this, Icy had finally wore herself out; she curled up into a little ball-legs drawn as closely to her chest as possible and began once more to sob softly...bitterly to herself. She felt just as helpless as she had the night she had down the pills.  
Maybe even more so.

And that was how Darcy and Stormy found her. Curled up and (by the time they arrived) whimpering weakly. Makeup running down from her puffy, bloodshot eyes all over her face in every direction, hair a mess and with bruising knuckles. The room in shambles. Stormy wasn't one to show anything other than immaturity and a shortness of temper, but even she found confusion etched across her face.

"You said you were fine." Darcy murmured, chastising herself for actually leaving Icy alone. "What exactly are you thinking right now?"

Icy said nothing, didn't even move. "Come on Ice, talk to me." Darcy tried again. Only a muffled cry.

"Is she okay?" Stormy asked.

"Does she look OKAY?" Darcy snapped. She knelt down beside Icy and placed a hand on her back rubbing in gentle circles. Icy sniffled, but other than that gave no response. "It'll get better, I promise." Darcy tried.

A long and heavy silence over took them. "How?" Icy's eventual reply came, it was soft...weak...barely audible.

But Darcy heard it none the less. "Because...you're going to have a beautiful, _healthy_ child, and he...or she will love you very much. You can give this kid the life your mom couldn't give you. You can _take care_of that baby and he or she will appreciate it. Appreciate you." She paused. "Stormy and I are here too ya know, we can help you take care of the baby."

"We can?" Stormy asked, earning herself a glare from Darcy. "We can." Stormy repeated this time in the from of a promise.

"Just let it go. Let life take its course, maybe it won't be as bad as you think." Darcy took Icy's hand and helped her into a sitting position. Resting her hand on her stomach and her head against the wall, Icy sucked in a deep breath, let it out, and eventually nodded. "This isn't going to happen again is it?" Darcy asked.

"Not anytime soon...I hope." Icy whispered.


	7. Innocent Silver

**Gonna be straight with everyone; I can't write a birth scene for the life of me, Heaven knows I tried. But it didn't work out so great so I admit to taking the easy way out. Also, sorry this one is so short, my first day back in college has me busy already.** **And lastly some thank yous to Akela Victoire, cybercorpsesnake, PierceTheVeils, and MissDiRed for your reviews and comments on the previous few chapters.**

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_The past few six months had been all over the place for Icy; she was fine one minute and then just like that she'd find herself overcome with anger or anguish. But, much to her surprise, she held true to her words. It-the absolute mental collapse didn't happen again. Though she continued to talk with Darcy and Stormy there was still something she kept to herself; fear. Icy was afraid, and she was never going to admit it..._

On the 12th of August Icy found herself laying in the hospital, staring up at the ceiling. She felt agonizingly weak, the past hour-or was it longer, it sure felt longer-had but an incredible strain on her body. Icy focused in on regulating her breathing once more, _in out...in out_ she repeated to herself in loops. She should be holding a baby girl right now. She should be giving it a name. Hell, she didn't even think of a name...perhaps she should get on that now, whilst she had time to kill. But no, that wasn't the reality of the situation. The reality was watching them carry away an abnormally small baby with "alarming respiratory distress and a high chance of being mute."

Imagine that, a baby with breathing problems, the inability to speak, and a concerning size. Icy should have listened to her initial instinct. She shouldn't have tortured the child by bringing it...her into a world where she'd find herself unable to speak. Unable to breath.

And then, after another long hour or so, the doctor bought the baby back into the room. He informed Icy that any further respiratory distress shouldn't be an issue. But the baby would definitely be a mute. Nevertheless the doctor cradled the baby in Icy's outstretched arms. Icy stared down at the baby; she stared right back up at her mother, with innocent eyes...her father's silvery-brown eyes. But on the upside, her hair definitely took on Icy's off-white blue color. She gently stroked the infant's cheek. Icy let out a sigh, at least the baby wouldn't keep her up at night with obnoxious crying. The baby nuzzled her head against Icy's breast.

"Aren't you going to name her?" Darcy broke the silence.

"You should name her after your best friend Stormy." Stormy suggested.

"She'd resent me forever if I did that." Icy spoke matter-of-factly.

"Fine then." Stormy pouted.

"I'm sure you can come up with something." Darcy assured her.

Icy propped herself up and pondered upon this. A bunch of names came to mind, but none of them good; they were to common or too strange. Too dull or too crazy. "You name him." Icy said at last.

"You should name her Stormy but spell it with an i-e instead of a y." Stormy declared proudly.

"Icy, she's your baby, you have to name her." Darcy insisted.

Again Icy thought; Krystal was too typical. Lacy too prissy. Grace, also prissy. Abby, Ashley, Stacy...okay now she was just pulling names out of nowhere. "Lucile." Icy proclaimed out loud.

"That's what you're going with?" Stormy frowned.

"I think it's perfect." Darcy argued.

"Perfect? Based on what? It's just a name." Icy mumbled.

"I don't know, I guess I just think it's a pretty name." Darcy replied.

"I guess so." Icy said, as she continued to rub her thumb up and down the baby's soft cheek. Of course she didn't giggle or make any other...happy-baby noises. But she looked happy enough.

And for the first time in a long time, Icy gave a genuine smile.


	8. The Next Seven Days

**Another thanks to everyone reviewing and following the story. Also, I would just like to announce that chapter 7 may be cursed, as the word count was 666. With that in mind I present to you chapter 8.**

* * *

And like that Icy found herself bed-bound. Despite much protest the doctors insisted that she'd stay another week or so. Typically she would have been able to leave after three or four days, but with all the complications the doctors shot down any excuse for her to leave.

And so Icy stayed the extra few nights, her entertainment-more or less-came in the form of a visit or two from Darcy and Stormy, petty reality T.V shows (mostly singing competitions) that Icy actually quite hated, and most pleasurably the hour or two in which Lucile was nestled in her arms. After which the doctors would take her back under their constant surveillance. At first Lucile would go with the doctor without a fuss of sorts. But the more contact she had with her mother the more she threshed and kicked upon being taken away. The baby would open her mouth wide-in what Icy assumed was an attempt at crying. Sometimes she would muster a small squeak. There had to be some kind of potion to solve the mute issue or at least a temporary spell...

And when Darcy and Stormy paid her a visit on day five, she demanded that they go to the library and find her both a spell and potion book on matters of speaking, vocals, and the art of talking backwards. Though Icy would skip the 'speaking backwards' chapters. When would that even be useful?

On day six the two of them returned with a stack, five books high; four of which were spell books, the other a potion book. Both Darcy and Stormy declaring that they didn't know what Icy had in mind so they just checked them all out. That night, rather than wasting time seeing if Julia would get kicked off of _Magix Music_, Icy skimmed through pages upon pages of books. None of which had any permanent solution to the problem. In fact, the spell book didn't have anything useful at all. And so it would seem that a constant supply of potion ingredients, among other childcare products, would be taking a serious chunk of Darcy's paycheck. Icy chuckled to herself; "why work two jobs when you can just steal you friend's money?" For now anyways. After she found herself used to caring for Lucile, she'd probably find herself a second job, or better yet, one job that paid fairly high. And she wondered why she was willing to do so much for a child she hadn't even wanted. And the answer came...

Icy wasn't her mother...  
She couldn't possibly be as negligent as _her_...

This time she _could_ save someone. Her work would be appreciated.

Day seven marked her second to last day in that dull hospital. Darcy and Stormy dropped by earlier than usual on that day. And they had smuggled in a potion like Icy had ordered. After much time the doctor finally handed Lucile over to Icy. The witch uncovered the potion Stormy had brewed. Checking once more over the page she found the recipe in to make sure there truly were no side effects. Aloe juice, mint tea, veela tears; none of the ingredients proved to be harmful to Lucile. Moreover, by the time the potion kicked in, Icy was holding a very cheerful squealing baby. Nothing could truly warm Icy's heart, but if there was one thing that came close, it was Lucile's chirpy baby babble.


	9. A Ride Home

**Sorry for the late(ish) updates. College is a real pain. I probably won't be updating on Tuesdays and Thursdays as those are my busy days. Anyhow thanks for baring with me and such. **

* * *

Icy was released from the hospital that night. Lucille on the other hand was to be kept under closer watch for another day or two. "Just to make sure that there really are no more complications" one of the doctors had declared. And so Icy found herself walking down the streets alone. About ten minutes of walking had Icy muttering to herself about how she should have called Darcy (even though the woman was at work) and demanded a ride home. But she was still holding on to the idea of stealing at least a little money from the woman's paycheck. Of course Stormy was an option too, but Icy had enough near death experiences in the last few months.

The streets of Magix were fairly empty so there was no calling a bus or a cab either. And then a car rounded the corner. "Ah, what the Hell" Icy murmured as she stepped into the very direction of the car, what was one more near death experience to her anyways? It's not like she'd kill the baby with her, and the car would stop anyhow.

The car came to a screeching halt a measly two feet from her. "Are you out of your mind?" Shouted the man driving the vehicle.

"Absolutely." Icy answered quite honestly.

"What the hell would you do that for?" The man asked getting out of his car, slamming the door shut behind him.

"Just wanted a ride home. You just so happened to be one of the few people actually driving tonight." Icy replied looking the man up and down.

He was fairly tall-but not taller than she-with a pretty muscular frame and a strong jaw line. _Not bad._ Icy thought to herself. Upon studying him further Icy noted a pair of golden eyes and a head of magenta hair that hung loosely down to his ear. The man was clad in a tuxedo.

"Why are you wearing a tux?" Icy asked simply.

"I don't know, why are _you_ wearing a hospital gown." The man returned the question.

A question that instantly had Icy cursing herself for forgetting to change back into her regular attire. Hell, she probably hadn't even tied her hair back up! With a swift snap of her fingers Icy had replaced that gaudy hospital gown with her diamond studded skirt and it's matching top. She decided that she'd just leave her hair down, she'd just be taking letting it loose anyways upon going to bed.

The man seemed to cringe. "Do you have a problem with this?" Icy motioned to her clothing.

He shook his head. "No,no. Not at all." He answered a little to quickly for Icy. Before she could say anything he spoke up again. "I'm wearing this tux because I had a job interview."

"Oh. And how did that go?" Icy inquired, not truly caring either way around, she just wanted her ride home.

"Fine I suppose. I've been having trouble finding a job lately." He confessed.

_Just great._ Icy muttered to herself. _If this average guy can't get a job, how the hell is someone who tried to take over the universe going to get a job? How the hell did Darcy get a job?_ "Are you listening to me." The man pulled her from her thoughts.

"No. Don't bother repeating yourself. That is unless your going to do so in the car, as you escort me home." Icy tapped her pointer against her chin.

"Are you sure you want to get in a car with _me_?" He asked.

"Well I'm damn sure I don't want to walk another five miles to get home." Icy shrugged.

The man considered. "Alright fine. Tell me where to go."

"No need for speaking." Icy replied as she snatched his keys and took a seat behind the wheel. "You can take the passages seat."

"But this is _my_ car." He protested.

"Sure is. And you can have it back as soon as I'm done with it." Icy smirked. She'd done some pretty reckless things in her lifetime, but she wasn't about to let another stranger touch her again. Then again, taking the stranger's car was pretty reckless too...oh well, she was already behind the wheel.

"I swear to God, if you kidnap me..." He started.

"Does it look like I have time for that. I just want to get home, get dinner, and go to sleep...in my own bed as opposed to the hospital bed." Icy cut him off. And without giving the man time to buckle his seat belt she took off.

"So,what was it that you were saying?" Icy asked after a moment of silence.

"Nothing. Never mind. It wasn't that important." The man replied.

"But you were so eager to tell me before." Icy rolled her eyes.

"Yes, you look familiar. I thought you were...an old friend of mine. I realized you weren't her, so never mind." he responded.

"Whatever dude." Icy stated as she pulled into the parking lot. She got out of the car and stood there for a moment, as the man made his way to the driver's side. "Thanks for the lift..." Icy started.

"Duman." Duman filled in.

"Icy." She replied simply. "See you around, Duman." She tossed him his keys, walked into the apartment complex, and pulled the door shut.

Truth be told he hoped he wouldn't see her around. He didn't particularity want her to know that he was the man who could have saved her. He should have just told her in the car instead of pulling that 'never mind' bullshit. He kicked the tire of his car-_what a shitty way to end the night._


	10. Midnight Call

**Sorry if the Wizards are terribly out of character. This is the part where I confessed that I did not actually watch season 4 (well I saw a few episodes) but not enough to keep them in character.**

* * *

Duman slumped besides Ogron on the sofa. "Heard you took a trip...to down town Magix." Ogron drummed his fingers on the coffee table.

"How? From who?" Duman asked.

"Does that really matter. Point is, if anyone finds out we're alive...well, we'll be alive no longer." Ogron informed.

"We...'died' on Earth." Duman argued. "Not Magix."

"And where do you think those faeries are from hu? Magix Duman! They're from Magix. Where do they go to school? Magix." Orgon slammed his fist down on the coffee table. "What were you doing in downtown Magix anyhow?"

"Unlike all of you, I'm actually trying to get a job. I'm trying to keep food on the table. While all of you sit around, planning revenge...raping women. I'm actually trying to do something with my life!" Duman yelled.

"A job?" Anagan snorted. "All we gotta do is steal what we want."

"Oh and we're gonna steal us something." Gantlos shot them all a smirk. "There's something out there that belongs to me. 'N Imma get it back."

"What was taken from you?" Duman asked.

* * *

Icy stepped into the apartment. "Well it's about time." Stormy greeted.

"Hello to you too." Icy slid her way past the other witch and over to the fridge. "You want to get me a spoon?"

"Not really." Stormy muttered, but proceeded to toss Icy a spoon regardless.

"I was getting sick of that hospital food." Icy stated as she served herself a scoop...or three of ice cream.

"You gonna share?" Stormy asked.

"No." Icy answered abruptly and hugged the tub of ice cream closer.

"You never share it." Stormy remarked silently to herself.

"Where's Darcy anyways?" Icy asked ignoring Stormy's last remark.

"Overtime." Stormy answered.

"Oh." Icy said between spoonfuls. "Okay then." After finishing her bowl of ice cream she fell upon the sofa.

"Aren't you going to put on your pajamas? Or at least walk to your room?' Stormy asked.

"Stormy, it's 12:00. I'm not nocturnal like Darcy. Now, do us both a favor and turn out the lights." Icy pointed in the general direction of the light switch.

* * *

At two in the morning came a pounding on the door.

"Stormy!" Icy yelled "Answer that."

"You're closer." Stormy whined from in her room.

Icy sighed. _Who comes to the door at two in the morning anyhow?_ With a yawn she groggily got to her feet.

"This better be pretty damn important." Icy hissed.

The man at the door was all to familiar to Icy. He was her ride home-and now, with his hair styled in its usual fashion, she recognized him-he was the one who let them rape her.

"He took her. He took your friend...the one with the brown hair and glasses." Duman blurted out before Icy had even a chance to kick his ass.

"Liar." Icy said flatly before attempting to slam the door.

Duman caught it with his wrist. "It's not a lie."

"Just how stupid do you think I am? Maybe hitching a ride with a complete stranger gave you the wrong idea. But I'll have you know I'm not fool enough to go back to _him_ just because you _claim_ he has Darcy." Icy hissed and attempted to close the door more forcefully.

"Damn it!" Duman ran a hand over his Mohawk. "I swear to God, he. Has. Her. And I'm here to help you get...Dracy back."

"Darcy." Icy corrected.

"Whatever. Point is, I'm here to _help_ you." Duman huffed.

"And what exactly did you do when I _asked_ for your help? You were in a corner. Whimpering like a little boy." Icy snarled.

"Maybe that's why I want to help you now." Duman shot back.

"Fine. But I'm driving again." Icy held her hand out.

"Whatever gets you to cooperate." He placed the keys in her hand.

"I thought you guys were dead." Icy remarked upon turning the corner.

"We faked that. It was Anagan's idea." Duman confessed.

"Lovely." Icy murmured. "Just lovely."

"We're here." Duman said. Icy slammed down on the breaks. "Shit, woman! You trying to wreck my car!?"

"At least I didn't wreck your life." Icy scowled.

"_I_ didn't do anything!" Duman practically shouted.

"Yeah." Icy hissed. "That's the problem." She slammed the door shut. "So. who else is home?"

"No one. They said they were going out to get some...supplies." Duman answered.

"And the best part is. You believed us." Ogron grinned lifting a gun to the man's head.

"And you." Came a voice from behind.

Icy spun to face him.

"You have two choices. Come with me, or watch this one..." Gantlos motioned to Darcy (held, with another gun to her head, by Anagan). "Die."


	11. The Sacrifice

**Fair warning this will be a more explicit chapter. Also gonna be shorter.**

* * *

"This is all my fault." Darcy winced. "I shouldn't have listened to them. I don't know what I was thinking."

"Maybe you were thinking of the gun at your head?" Duman declared.

Icy lifted her hand, willing a sphere of ice into her open palm.

"They say a bullet travels faster than magic. Wanna find out if it's true." Gantlos threatened.

The ball of light faded. "That's right, now. You coming with us, or is she?" Ogron asked.

And again Icy thought of Gantlos on top of her. Her chin gripped roughly in his hands, forced to look into his eyes as he pushed further into her. Was she really going to put herself in that situation again? Icy was about to say yes, to spare Darcy, when she was hit with another vision—this one thrice as intense; his fingers on her breast, and then his tongue. And the wet trail it left as he dragged it lower and lower.

Icy felt sick. Light headed. She seemed to sway slightly and prepared herself to fall flat on the ground. "What's it going to be? You're truly testing my patience." Gantlos growled.

"Can't we just take them both?" Ogron asked. "I get the dark witch, you get the ice witch."

"Fine. You can have me. But she's getting in Duman's car and he's driving her home first." Icy muttered. After all, she was already filthy. Darcy on the other hand actually had something to lose.

Gantlos smirked. "You heard the bitch, Duman, take the other one home." He turned to Icy. "And you…well my dear, we're going to have some more fun. If I remember right, we didn't get to finish last time."

Icy scowled. "You bastard."

"As feisty as ever." Gantlos chuckled. He grabbed a handful of Icy's hair and shoved her inside, just as Duman pulled away.

Gantlos shoved her to the bed. And with help from the other two, once again had her tied up. This time to the bedposts. And it began, one button at a time he undid her night gown. Until she lie there, just as exposed as the first time. This time he didn't hesitated, he went right in. And forcefully at that. Icy cried out in both unwanted pleasure and pain.

And with the pleasure and pain came a surge of anger. Not just anger—utter blinding rage. With something of a new found strength, she kneed him in the stomach. Hard. She wouldn't let him do it, not again. She froze the bindings and then Ogron.

"What the Hell do you think you're doing!?" Gantlos shouted.

"You're death isn't going to be so fake this time." Icy hissed as she shattered both the bindings and the other man.

"Shit!" Gantlos yelled.

"You can't have me." Icy snarled, landing a swift blow on his cheek. She would make him suffer for everything. She punched him again. And again. At the fifth punch he attempted to fight back.

"No, this time you get to be the victim." Icy spat, and with those words she froze his right hand solid. "You won't touch me ever again." She growled and slammed her foot down on his hand.

"You sure about that?" He asked.

The last thing she saw was his face. The bullet met her heart. She had time to put her hand to the bleeding gunshot wound before she fell to the floor.


	12. Waking Up Is The Hardest Part

She couldn't see anything, nor could she feel anything. She could only hear the sound of her own breaths, and they sounded strangely rhythmic and calm for someone who'd just been shot.

Slowly regaining her vision, Icy pulled herself upright. A stab of pain shot it's way from her hip to her stomach. And an even sharper jolt of pain shot from her head.

"Thank God." Darcy exclaimed upon entering the room.

"What's going on?" Icy asked weakly.

"Why don't you ask him." Stormy pointed to the doorway.

Duman leaned himself on the doorway-hair not styled with a mohawk "Car accident." He said after a moment.

"Car accident? No I was at home, I was..." Icy started.

"You never made it back." Darcy frowned. "We got a call from him ant around two in the morning."

"No. No, I. You, they took you and I went to get you at two in the morning." Icy protested.

"You were here at two in the morning." Duman "It was a head injury."

"How bad?" Icy lifted a hand to her throbbing head.

"You needed ten stitches across your hip, and three on your forehead." Darcy explained.

"But what about the Wizards?" Icy started.

"It was a dream." Darcy stated matter-of-factly.

"But you're...aren't you Duman? Aren't you the one who..." Icy questioned.

"Yes, I told you that in the car. Before the accident." Duman replied.

"But are all of you really, still alive?" Icy asked.

"All of us but Anagan. He didn't make it." Duman explained.

"Where are they now?" Icy asked.

"I don't know, I haven't talked to them much since that night." Duman admitted. "All I know of them is that they were the ones who crashed into my car before speeding off."

Icy sighed realizing the nature of her situation. "Damnit, I _just_ got out of here."

"Relax, they said, you can leave in an hour or two. And you can take Lucille with you." Darcy assured her.

That hour passed by surprisingly quickly. Between humorous exchanges from Darcy and Stormy and a few witty remarks from Duman. As well as the eventual placing of Lucille in her arms.

After much arguing Stormy managed to find herself behind the wheel. And Icy found herself wondering how many times she could get into the hospital in under three days. Stormy better slow down.

In the back seat Icy clutched Lucile quite tightly. When they all got home, she'd have that potion ready and a babbling baby.

"I didn't know you had a baby." Duman remarked.

"Your friend is her father." Icy pointed out.

"Oh." Duman mumbled. "Sorry."

"Yeah." Icy replied. That's when the silence fell at its heaviest. Icy carefully ran her fingers over the baby's thin patch of hair.

"Are you keeping her then?" Duman asked. "Or are you going to put her up for adoption.

"Now there's an idea." Icy muttered sarcastically. "Yes, I'm keeping her."

Stormy parked the car. Icy was home. For real this time...

* * *

**I think I'm done with the mind fuckery now guys.**


	13. Home

Icy took a seat on the edge of her bed. Honestly she had no clue where to start with this baby. [i]with the potion[/i] she decided.

"Darcy, you want to get me the potion ingredients?" Icy asked.

"Not really." Darcy answered but did so anyhow.

"Can you watch Lucile while I make it?" She requested.

"I can do it." Duman replied.

"Why is he still here?" Icy muttered.

"He needed a place to stay and I told him he could stay here if he did our house work for us." Stormy shrugged.

"Whatever." Icy said flatly and handed Lucile to Duman. And with that she began working on the potion.

She placed each ingredients in the mini-cauldron and waited for it to boil. Perhaps she would teach the child to make the potion herself one day. Yeah, she would make a mental note of that.

The potion began to bubble over so Icy turned the stove off. She poured a bit of the mix into Lucile's baby bottle and gave it a light shake.

"I'll take my child back." Icy held out her arms.

"Sure thing." Duman said, returning the baby.

Icy cradled the baby in one arm and with the other held the bottle for Lucile, who began drinking it down in small gulping sips.

"Hey. I'm really sorry about what my friends did..." Duman stared.

"Save it." Icy cut him off. It's not so much that she didn't forgive him, more so that she didn't believe in apologizing for something you didn't do...or really apologizing at all. After all, what's done is done-being brutally honest; a thousand sorrys couldn't bring her virginity back. But then again she hadn't even had it when Gantlos attacked her anyways.

"Really I am." Duman pressed.

"Don't be." Icy replied, looking to the baby squirming in her arms.

"I can help you take care of..."

"Lucile." Icy filled in.

"Right. I can help you take care of her." Duman offered.

"Flattering. I'll consider." Icy replied as she set the bottle on the table.

Lucile began her babble again. And with a happy giggle she took a handful of Icy's hair and put it in her mouth. Icy quickly jerked it out of the baby's mouth. She'd tolerate most things, but not having her hair sucked on. Naturally, at this, Lucile began to wail. And despite a slur of comforting words refused to stop.

"Fine." Icy said with a sigh and gave the infant back the strand of her hair. In under seconds the baby had Icy's hair back in her mouth.


	14. Matters Of Parenthood

_"You can't really do it can you." The woman standing before her asked. "You couldn't take care of us...take care of me. How are you going to take care of that baby?"_

Icy stood motionlessly beneath the flickering streetlight, lips pressed tightly together.

"You couldn't save didn't even look back." The woman remarked.

"I did. I went back the next day to find you. But you were gone. You abandoned me." Icy yelled.

"And you're going to do the same thing with...what's her name? Linda...Lucy? Right, Lucille." The woman stated very flatly.

"No." Icy replied simply.

"Yes. You will. I abandoned you, surely you will abandon her. Like mother like daughter." The woman mocked as she stepped out of the light.

Icy found herself kicking the lamppost. She then proceeded to walk across the street. It was dark, darker than she would have liked. The only source of light there really was, was now on the other side of the road. No matter, Icy had to get back to her child.

She would prove her mother wrong.

A hand found its way to Icy's shoulder. She spun around to stare the man or woman in the eye. He was so much a man as he was a demon; blonde hair, matted and messy clung to his bloodstained and gaunt face. He pulled her into the alley and it began again. Her mother standing by...watching.

"You won't make it back." Her mother said simply. "One way or another, you'll abandon her."

The dream faded so rapidly Icy could swear she felt the slap of reality. This was the third time she'd had this dream since bringing Lucile home. And deep down she wondered if it was all foreshadowing something to come.

She ran a hand through her hair and walked over to the baby's crib. All seemed well with the sleeping infant. Icy thought about lifting her from the crib, but decided to leave the child to her sleep. Besides, waking Stormy up was a lot funner anyhow. Or perhaps testing Duman's reaction to being woken up at an ungodly hour would be interesting.

Icy blasted a big pile of snow onto the sleeping man's body and waited.

After a minute or two the wizard bolted up right. "Holy shit!" He hollered. "The hell is this!?"

"Morning." Icy remarked.

"Morning? It's still dark out!" Duman hollered.

"It's dark at three in the morning." Icy shrugged.

Duman grumbled and looked at the clock. "Damn it woman, do you always awake at the very buttcrack of dawn!?"

"Only since I met you." Icy answered. It wasn't untrue. She couldn't deny that she'd been riddled with nightmares since the night of her rape.

"I'm flattered." Duman muttered.

"Are you?" Icy asked.

"What are you even...why did you wake _me_ of all people up?" Duman asked a question of his own.

"Baby actually sleeps through the night, unlike her mom. Darcy can sleep through the bombing of Magix City. And Stormy gets boring after a while." _And I kind of wanted to talk to you anyhow_. Icy answered, leaving that last thought out.

"Lovely. Why are you awake at this hour anyways?" Duman continued his questionnaire.

"Couldn't sleep I suppose." Icy answered.

"Yes, clearly. Why couldn't you sleep though?" Duman pushed.

Icy considered the question, trying to find the right way to answer. "You ever have a moment in your life you just keep coming back to? A person who won't leave you alone even when you know they're gone?"

"Is this about..."

"No." Icy cut in abruptly. "Not entirely. I mean I suppose that's part of it. But then. But then there's my mother..." she trailed off.

"What about your mom?" Duman asked

"A while back I lived on the streets with my mother. I kind of took care of us both. Or I tried to and then she spend the money I earned on alcohol and drugs. I...left her for a bit, came back and she was gone." Icy replied.

"Sounds like my dad." Duman shrugged. "He was kind of an asshole; spent his time gambling and beating my mom."

"What happened to him?" Icy asked.

"Cheated a man out of a million dollars. The man found him and killed him for it." Duman replied. "I'm still trying to decide if that was the best or worst thing that could have happened to me."

Icy couldn't help but to laugh. There was no doubt that she felt the same about her mother. "Perhaps we should all just go to group therapy or something. You, Darcy, Stormy, and I. They had pretty crappy parents too."

"What were their parents like?" Duman asked.

"That's for them to tell you, not me." Icy shrugged.

"So, uh, if you don't mind me asking; why exactly does she keep you up at night?"

"Dreams. She and your friends...ex-friends-whatever they are to you-like to show up a lot. In this one she watched the blonde one...rape me." Icy confessed. "And she probably really would too. If it actually happened again in front of her I mean."

"I'm sure that's not true, she's your mom." Duman assured.

"She'd have been too drunk to care." Icy protested.

"Well, at least one of us has a good mother." Duman shrugged.

"And who would that be?" Icy asked.

Duman looked Icy straight in the eyes "Lucille."

* * *

**In which Duman is one smooth motherfudger!**


	15. Making Small Talk

**Finally got around to updating.**

* * *

It was Darcy's idea, she had to drag Icy out of the house kicking and screaming, in a figurative sense that is. Alright, maybe the screaming part was more literal. But none the less Icy found herself sitting in a small room holding her baby.

The room had an aura of calmness to it, which put Icy on edge. Nothing was ever this serene. In the corner sat a potted plant of sorts, next to it a small fireplace. What kind of shrink had an office with a fireplace? Before her rested an oak-wood desk. And behind the desk sat an elderly woman.

"She's a beautiful baby you know?" The shrink remarked.

Icy shrugged and said nothing.

"We're here to talk about her father I assume." The woman asked.

"I don't want to talk about anything." Icy replied and looked down at Lucille...anything to avoid eye contact.

"Look, I know this is..."

"Hard? No. I'm fine." Icy dismissed.

"That's not what your friend seems to think." The woman stated.

"She's not my friend she's my sister." Icy replied. "Or at least if feels...it should be that way."

"And why is that?" The woman asked. "Do you not have a real family."

"My father is dead." Icy yelled, eyeing the shrink quite hostilely. The sudden volume set Lucille off crying. The witch looked down and attempted to silently soothe the child. Her efforts useless, so she let the child cry.

"Did you try vocally calming the baby?" The woman changed the subject.

"It won't work." Icy muttered.

"Did you try?" The woman repeated.

"No." Icy answered.

"Well then."

Icy looked back down at Lucille. "I'm just glad she's crying?"

"What?" The woman's eyes went wide.

"It means the potion is still working...It means she still _can_ cry."

"What happened to her?"

"She was born unable to speak." Icy answered as the child continued to wail.

"And how did this make you feel?" The shrink asked.

"How the hell do you think it made me feel?" Icy snarled.

"I don't know, you'd have to tell me." The woman adjusted her spectacles.

"I felt like it was my fault." Icy said so softly it almost went unheard.

"How is something like that you're fault?" The woman asked.

"I didn't. I wouldn't go to the hospital. Not until Darcy told me to...three or so months in." Icy still refused to look up.

Lucille still refused to stop crying. Icy brushed her hair over her shoulder. The baby's eyes seemed to brighten. She giggled and put her mother's hair in her mouth. Icy sighed, wondering if she'd have to let the baby chew on her hair every time she cried.

"I was to have a child myself at one time. Wouldn't have mattered if I went it right away or three months later...the doctor still would have told me the same thing; that the baby'd be born dead." The woman shared.

"Why are you telling me this?" Icy asked.

"Because, I've heard about you. You've done a lot of things wrong." She paused "But that wasn't one of them."

Icy said nothing.

"We're out of time today. But I should like to see you again. You're probably both the most mentally stable and least mentally stable patient I've had in a while."

"How does that even work?" Icy questioned as she rose.

"You're good at hiding what you feel...it's a dangerous thing."


	16. Epilogue: Like Hand Prints In The Snow

**So this is probably going to be the last chapter. I may do a spin off later on that details Icy's sessions, but as of late I've been pretty busy so I'm gonna stick to one shots. This chapter is kind of an epilogue. I'm glad everyone liked the fic so much. I will start on more multi-part fics when things start to calm down. Again, thanks everyone for all the reviews and follows. **

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She had gone back to talk to the shrink (who she'd come to know as Linda Blace) on multiple occasions. At first she was a stubborn and silent as the first time. But as the sessions went on, much like with Darcy, she had opened up. Most of the talks laced back to her mother and the abuse that woman had subjected her to. And then later on, about the night of her rape and Lucille. Icy didn't quite mind talking about Lucille. In turn Linda would offer Icy advice and encouragement. Some things she had needed to hear but would never admit to. And eventually Darcy and Stormy would provide this support as well. Though most of the sessions were spent talking of how Icy still felt guilty over Lucille's condition. Linda would continue to insist that it was not her fault. And that Icy had every right to be hesitant to go to the doctor.

As for the dreams, Icy would be lying if she said she never dreamed of his face again-or of her mother's for that matter. But both became less intense and less frequent as time wore on. Her mind would occasionally conjure up a vision or two of her mother chastising her for the way she was raising Lucille or of Gantlos advancing on her again. But for the most part she'd just forget about it in the morning. Apparently the more she tried to suppress her problems in reality, the more the surfaced with in her subconscious. And when she finally decided to discuss the issues, the dreams seemed to lose their power.

And in this time Icy had also made an effort to talk to Duman. The man wouldn't seem to stop apologizing for not helping her that night until she finally vocalized her forgiveness.

As it would turn out, Duman had done most of the care-taking of Lucille when Icy was with Linda. The man was practically a father to the baby. So Icy had taken it upon herself to share with him Lucille's habits; she hated most all fruit but had this strange fondness for vegetables-clearly that was from her biological dad. Icy tended to attribute most of Lucille's downsides to Gantlos' genetics rather than her own. Icy let Duman know that Lucille enjoyed playing with building blocks as opposed to coloring or scribbling. And when she did color, Icy had made sure to teach her that blue was the best color. The outcome of this was usually a page of her coloring book shaded entirely in blue alone-not that Icy disproved or anything. Though Lucille didn't care much for coloring books, she had discovered a love for drawing on the walls-Icy quickly instructed her to take her drawing to Stormy's room. By the end of the week Stormy had a mini mural on her bedroom wall. And if she so much as put a drop of paint over it, the girl would start to cry and pound her fists into the ground. A habit she had picked up from watching Icy. One that Darcy was determined to put a stop to.

Somewhere along the lines Darcy and Stormy made a habit of insisting that Icy and Duman were in a romantic relationship of sorts. Icy didn't confirm nor deny it, to be honest she couldn't really tell herself. So she just remained silent. Duman didn't really bring it up either. But after much pondering Icy came to conclude that they had probably developed some unofficial relationship; after all, the wizard was practically fathering her child with her.

And so it came as no surprise to anyone really when-at a much later date-the two ended up marrying each other. Duman had wanted a marriage on the beach. He got the exact opposite; a wedding in a very snowy landscape. He froze his ass of in that tux. His face in their wedding photo was priceless. And despite his protests Icy hung it on the mantle for everyone to see.

And a year or so later, Icy had taken up a job as a professor at Cloud Tower. Her former headmistress was somewhat hesitant to hand her the job but decided to give her a chance anyhow. After all who better to teach a class of witches than a former top-of-the-class student. Who better to keep them in line than someone who had a desire to rule the world. And when it came time for Griffin to retire, the headmistress title was passed to Icy.

By this time, Lucille had grown to the age of six. She would follow Icy to work on occasions, not that Icy cared. The child was a fairly mischievous girl, quite fond of sass and sarcasm. But she all and all she was a very sweet child. She was a good listener, at least to Icy. She'd obey Duman too, but she was clearly a mama's girl. Icy had taught the girl how to brew the up her own potion. By the time Lucille was five she had learned to make it on her own. Icy had plans to teach the girl to speak without the aid of any spell or potion. She would do so by brewing a fake potion and telling the girl it was real. She had hopes that Lucille would be so convinced she could speak that she actually would. And then afterwards Icy would tell the girl that the potion was a fake and she could speak on her own. Psychology at its finest. But that would come much later.

And in ten years time Icy had decided to share with Lucille the truth around her birth. About how Duman wasn't her real father. That her real father was dead, but that was for the best. She had spent much time dreading this day. She hadn't really known what to tell Lucille. How was she supposed to tell the child that her father was a horrid person? For a good month or so Lucille had cut both of her parents off for 'lying to her' and 'keeping such secrets.'

That whole month was littered with back and forth arguments and shouts across the house from Icy to Lucille. From 'I hate you's' from Lucille to 'I didn't even want you anyways' or 'I knew I shouldn't have taught you how to speak' from Icy. Duman was completely caught in the middle and often left to comfort one of the two. He would start with assuring Lucille that Icy hadn't meant that. And then going to Icy and saying something of the same sort. He would also add that Lucille knew she didn't mean what she said.

Whether she would show it or not Duman knew that Icy felt some sort of guilt after saying such to her own child. It reminded her too much of how her mother had treated her. Maybe her mother was right, maybe she would turn out just like her.

In this Icy bought herself to apologize. For not just the harsh exchanges but for leaving Lucille without vocal abilities for the first eight years of her life. To which Lucille insisted that it was alright. That it was her fault for handling the news wrong. That she shouldn't have started the I hate you's. And Icy would ask if Lucille believed her when she said she didn't want her. To Icy's relief, the girl said that she'd didn't buy it at all. And then she added that it was not Icy's fault that she was born mute. How could it have been? And like that the last of her wounds seemed to heal.

Duman was pretty excited that he wouldn't have to worry about a rift in the family. Darcy and Stormy were just glad that the two would no longer be shouting over the movies they were trying to watch.

As of this moment Icy had all she never knew she wanted. She had a feeling that things would possibly look up from then on out. And to the very end Lucille would be with her, in her memories, like soft hand prints in the snow.


End file.
